I thought it might be good to unpack my previous post with a concrete example of what I mean.
Let's take the common, everyday situation of conflict. Conflict stalks us every day, especially if we're honest about our interactions with our nearest and dearest. It might be as common as conflicting emotions or agendas, but maybe it's something like a thankfully-not-too-common-in-our-house argument.
When we get into this type of conflict with someone all sorts of goals push to the fore. It might be the goal of proving that you are in the right, and as a result your opponent is in the wrong. It might be the goal of resolving the conflict as peacefully as possible (this kind of response can sometimes be a jackel in bishop's clothing - presenting the aura of Christianity while actually masking what is really just fear). We allow these goals to control the way that we relate in the argument. If our goal is to prove our point, we may find ourselves reduced to bullying tactics. If our goal is peaceful resolution, we may find ourselves willingly taking the blame for something we didn't do or say, not because of noble intent but because of insecurity.
Now imagine that your goal in all situations - including the argument - is 'to become more Christ-like'. Suddenly you are presented with a choice. Pursue one of the goals above, or attempt to respond to this as Christ would. If your goal is to win the argument then you become blind to your own incorrect behaviour. If you are trying to be like Christ then you may find that your view of who is right and who is wrong becomes alarmingly clear. If you are trying to win the argument then the primary focus is the other person's failings and unwillingness to be convinced. If you are trying to be like Christ then the primary focus becomes your own actions and motives. The reality is that, for Christians in conflict, who is right and who is wrong is rarely the biggest issue. It is all too easy to win the argument and lose your soul. So, what happens if the other person won't respond as Christ would to you? That's not the issue. The issue is how did you respond, and that's all that God will hold you responsible for. And growth will follow as sure as night follows day.
If, in every and any situation you face each day, the thought at the forefront of your mind is "How can I respond to this as Christ would" then you will find yourself becoming more and more like Him.
As an aside, if you wish to hear the talk that I gave at the Strathalbyn mini-muster then you can find it here - http://www.cornerstone.edu.au/mini-muster-talks. Some of the musings will not be new to regular readers of this blog, as I did some of my thinking outloud on these pages. I also strongly recommend Paul's talk on "Spirit Led Reckless Abandonment". Good stuff.
Monday, July 26, 2010
Sunday, July 18, 2010
"Turn and Face the Changes..."
As David Bowie sang.
One of the things that I reflect on are the changes that happen in my life. By 'changes' I don't just mean the environmental things but rather the changes in my character.
I've found it more and more helpful to think of God's will for my life being as simple as "become more Christ-like" and then taking advantage of the freedom that gives. The result of this is that I tend to review my life not in terms of where I am or what I am doing, but rather in terms of who I am. I think this is utterly consistent with the New Testament, as so much of what Peter, Paul et al call us to in terms of obedience to God is to do with character rather than what specific things we are doing.
This means that I like to take time every now and then to have an out-of-body experience and see how I have changed in the past few months. My hope is that I will have indeed "become more Christ-like" in the way that I relate and act. It's exciting because sometimes we link 'change' to our external circumstances so much that we think it is impossible to grow unless our environment changes. We think (and proclaim) that those wonderfully painful moments of growth come only when really cataclysmic things happen in our life - a lost job, a death in the family, depression etc. But we experience great growth in those moments not because God made things work that way, but simply because we've become so accustomed to stagnation that God has to shake things up to move us along. It doesn't have to be this way. Christ-likeness is to be pursued every moment of every day, so much so that when our circumstances change in a distressing way we should not be looking to them to provide our growth but rather our reaction to them should prove our growth.
Of course, looking for growth out of hard times is a good response, but I would rather that the pursuit of Christ-likeness be my norm rather than an unusual occurance. When it is seen through the lens of 'character' rather than 'achievement' then it can become the norm. There are a billion opportunities each day to grow, refine and shape our characters.
One of the things that I reflect on are the changes that happen in my life. By 'changes' I don't just mean the environmental things but rather the changes in my character.
I've found it more and more helpful to think of God's will for my life being as simple as "become more Christ-like" and then taking advantage of the freedom that gives. The result of this is that I tend to review my life not in terms of where I am or what I am doing, but rather in terms of who I am. I think this is utterly consistent with the New Testament, as so much of what Peter, Paul et al call us to in terms of obedience to God is to do with character rather than what specific things we are doing.
This means that I like to take time every now and then to have an out-of-body experience and see how I have changed in the past few months. My hope is that I will have indeed "become more Christ-like" in the way that I relate and act. It's exciting because sometimes we link 'change' to our external circumstances so much that we think it is impossible to grow unless our environment changes. We think (and proclaim) that those wonderfully painful moments of growth come only when really cataclysmic things happen in our life - a lost job, a death in the family, depression etc. But we experience great growth in those moments not because God made things work that way, but simply because we've become so accustomed to stagnation that God has to shake things up to move us along. It doesn't have to be this way. Christ-likeness is to be pursued every moment of every day, so much so that when our circumstances change in a distressing way we should not be looking to them to provide our growth but rather our reaction to them should prove our growth.
Of course, looking for growth out of hard times is a good response, but I would rather that the pursuit of Christ-likeness be my norm rather than an unusual occurance. When it is seen through the lens of 'character' rather than 'achievement' then it can become the norm. There are a billion opportunities each day to grow, refine and shape our characters.
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